My sisters are terrorists....

My sisters are terrorists. Not to the country. Not to the state or the community.

They. Terrorize. ME.

Being the oldest I am always chosen as the referee.

 Can’t I have a moment of insanity and whine and scream and curse and unleash my inner brat? NO. Why you ask? Besides the fact that I am a wife and mom, 2 of my 3 younger sisters decided they wanted to unleash their inner brat. But instead of having ‘moments’ they choose to act that way ‘daily’. I end up being the reasonable one who will sit everyone down, put them in their place and tell them what’s right is right and what’s wrong is wrong. Okay, so maybe I have had a couple of bratty moments (like when I told my sister and her bf they were acting like petty bitches lol) but normally I put out the fires. However it can get pretty ridiculous. I hoped and prayed for the day my sisters would grow up and take care of themselves. Me being the older sister I was dubbed as the built-in babysitter so I was constantly thinking “man it is going to be AWESOME when they get older!” WRONG! What the heck was I thinking? Did I actually think it would be easier when they hit their teenage years with all the hormones and a constant slew of caffeine and sugar in their bloodstream? Yup. I got bamboozled.

Today for example, I am at work reading blogs very busy and I peek under my desk to see if my janky phone is still charging after I ghetto-rigged the cord to catch a connection. I have a text from my sister who I call Twin Uno because she was born first. It read as follows:

Twin Uno: after graduation I am leaving town with you. I can’t take this anymore!!!

Me: What is going on?

Twin Uno: I am at school and I am getting cursed out and threatened!

Me: By who?? (waiting for her response my heart is beating so fast because I assume she’s getting bullied or something)

Twin Uno: Twin Dos and her bf texted me cursing me out about some donuts I ate.

 (I promise I had to read it twice to make sure I read right. Yep she said donuts. W.T.F.)

Me: Tell them to eff off leave you alone and then ignore them.

Okay so my advise isn’t always reasonable, G-rated or worth a Nobel Peace Prize. But hey, it’s free and my coffee hasn’t kicked in yet. 

Do you play referee to any of your siblings or children? If so, how do you keep them from killing each other while not being a drunken mess in the process? Trust me, I would LOVE to know.

Photo credit: Blind Gossip